Category: Personal

Nov 21

Why Maternal Health Matters to Me (#2)

My second pregnancy was more challenging than the first, mainly because I already had a toddler! At 35 weeks, we learned baby was breech. I was a good candidate for a version, but he would not turn. (Also, the procedure is really painful.) So they scheduled me for a C-section.

But baby boy had other ideas! I went into labor a week after the attempted version, two weeks before my due date. Naturally, it was again late at night, and this time I hadn’t filled out any of the paperwork yet—plus they couldn’t reach my OB or the on-call doctor. My labor was progressing. Baby’s heart rate crashed once, and all of a sudden there were nurses calmly shouting codes that meant “get that oxygen over here, now!”  Fortunately, everything worked out. They did one more ultrasound to confirm baby was still breech, then walked me to the OR.

I knew I was in a fantastic hospital with experienced nurses, doctors, anesthesiologists, and specialists standing by, but getting up onto that operating table myself, knowing they were going to cut me open, is still one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. (I’ve had a low-trauma life, for which I’m grateful.)

He had quite a healthy cry but calmed down when we got to snuggle.

Now imagine you’re in labor and you know something’s wrong, but you don’t know why. Or you don’t have access to fetal heart rate monitors, portable ultrasound machines, or first0class operating rooms, so giving birth breech is a huge risk. Most births don’t require surgical intervention, but when it’s needed, it can be the difference between life and death. I want to improve every woman’s access to life-saving care. I hope you’ll join me in donating to Every Mother Counts!

grandpa holding baby
Proud Grandpa!

Oct 31

Why Birth Justice Matters to Me (#1)

My parents watched anxiously from the waiting room at the end of the hall as a cadre of hospital staff in scrubs trooped into my labor and delivery room.

Inside the room it was less scary, but of course, I knew what was going on. The doctor had diagnosed that baby’s head was turned to the side, so his “progress through the birth canal was impeded.” In other words, he was stuck. After an hour of pushing, I needed intervention.

The doctor recommended a vacuum-assisted delivery. Pro: no C-section. Con: you get one contraction. One. Chance. My husband and I agreed that we should try, but we still had to wait for the operating room to clear—because if you don’t get the baby out, you need an emergency C-section!

Any time a birth requires medical intervention, a bunch of people come in the room just in case, hence the parade my parents witnessed. Happily, baby came out (I am so glad I had an epidural for that part) and was pronounced healthy, and I was holding him before I knew it!

Birth #1 successful!

My mom says that as the staff filed out again, one of them gave her a thumbs-up and said everything was fine. I suspect they can spot an anxious about-to-be-grandma when they see one!

Proud Granny

Now, let’s count the ways in which I was fortunate:

  • prenatal care at an OB/GYN clinic associated with a top-ranked hospital
  • advanced, dedicated maternity center
  • multiple ultrasounds before and during birth
  • birth classes and hospital tour ahead of time (familiarity)
  • private room with a bed that can be rolled straight to the O.R. if needed
  • NICU available
  • medical interventions available and reliable
  • great insurance

I want all women to have access to as many of those birthing privileges as possible. Every Mother Counts is an organization dedicated to increasing access to maternity care in America and around the world. In conjunction with NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) and the Mighty Pens, a group of writers, I’m raising money for EMC’s Birth Justice fund during the month of November. I know you might not be in a position to give (2020!), and that’s OK! I just wanted to share why the issue of birth justice is so important to me. But if you want to contribute to this great cause, I hope you’ll join me!

Mar 03

I have a mentor!

What does that mean? Technically nothing, emotionally everything, and practically, somewhere in between. 

What do you mean, a mentor?

There are many writing contests run online, usually publicized through Twitter, where writers can win mentorship and/or editing from another author, an editors, or an industry pro. Mentors publicize what they’re interested in reading, what their editing style is, and what they look for in a mentee. Writers submit a query, first pages, sometimes a synopsis, and sometimes answers to questions about themselves/their book, choosing two to four mentors to read their entry. The process is very similar to querying agents, by design! Then each mentor picks one (or sometimes two) authors to help with polishing up their work to a diamond shine.

I saw some mentors that seemed perfect for my second novel, code-named Ballroom, so I entered. I got a request within four hours of submitting—which, to be honest, has a lot to do with luck of who’s reading submissions. Like agents, mentors are searching for a love connection with a story, and in these contests, additionally for a book they have ideas to improve.

Reader, I made a love connection.

Technically nothing

I mean, as far as career progress that the IRS would consider taxable, a mentor doesn’t count. Getting one means having another critique partner, a cheerleader, a guide, one who’s walked the path you hope to be on, but that’s it.

Emotionally everything

But “that’s it”? Oh, no, dear reader! Having someone who’s never met me and doesn’t know me pick my story out of their submissions and want to read more is the most validating experience an author can have. And then to have that mentor be so, so excited about so many of the things you love about your own story, well… that’s everything!

Practically, somewhere in between

I feel so loved and supported and uplifted. Sure, winning a contest doesn’t guarantee an agent or a book deal, but it guarantees having one more friend in my corner to encourage me, challenge me, and support my question. Cat, I can’t wait!!

Anna from Frozen being super excited
Me all day today

Sep 25

Fun Facts About Abigail

(You can find my official bio at About Me.)

I’m so extroverted it’s painful, according to my introverted husband.

I can’t remember when I didn’t want to be an author. I wrote my first story in Kindergarten, and I still have it (thanks, Mom!). It was about a princess, a dragon, and a knight, so… not much has changed.

Me dressed up for Halloween as Wonder Woman in the blue ballgown with the sword down the back of it.
#WWGotYourBack

Costumes I’ve worn in public: Jem, She-Ra, Wonder Woman (before everyone knew how cool she was), Princess Peach, Princess Buttercup, Agent Lucy Wilde (my son really wanted to be a Minion), Galadriel.

My writing ritual requires tea and I drink unhealthy quantities of it.

In fact, I carry teabags in my purse because you never know when you might be stuck without and need good tea.

My favorite Doctor is Ten (but Nine was my first, and you never forget your first).

Chocolate is life and you can’t persuade me otherwise. I’ve now trained myself to like dark chocolate, and the best chocolate bar I’ve ever tasted is Divine Chocolate Hazelnut Truffle. If you bribe me with that I will do almost anything for you.

My pinned Tweet has lots more fun facts about me from #PWPoePrompts. (For the usual facts, you can also check out my professional bio.)

My Manuscript

Here’s the song that inspired the work I submitted…

…and here’s an aesthetic for the two main characters, Robbie and Lara.

square two dancers

Oct 02

Deadlines and Anniversaries: I Finished (Again)!

Last month, the second anniversary of my transition to being a full-time writer passed without my noticing. Maybe the second anniversary is never as exciting as the first, but I also have an excuse: I was finishing my book!

I told myself I would finish in April. Then in May. Then in July or August. But I know the difference between a real deadline and a fake one, so I knew I had to create consequences. I decided that if I got to September and still hadn’t finished, I would cancel all my social engagements until I did! Unfortunately, I didn’t clarify to myself. What about weekends, when I have to come up with ways to entertain the kids? What about parties I’d already agreed to host or attend? It wasn’t a clear enough consequence.

BUT. I finished! This is version 4.5 since September 2016, when I sat down with a new abundance of time and nothing but an outline. Version 1 was in third person POV and reused a character from an older version as the love interest. Then in January of 2017, I fell out of love with him. For version 2, I chucked about 30,000 words and the love interest, scrambling to finish by the end of April (and the real deadline of my editor). In version 3, I switched to first person POV (on said editor’s advice). Version 4 rejiggered all the relationships, took some great feedback from several more amazing editors, ruthlessly chopped 9,000 words (and so many darlings) from the first half, and added 6,000 words to flesh out the end.

Reader, I am so proud of this version. Of course I can always continue to improve it, and I’ll have to, but it’s amazing to finally, finally be garnering interest from agents. (Very, very small nibbles, but even teeny tiny bits of affirmation can sustain an author for a long time!) When I get more feedback, I will continue to incorporate it, but… I’m done! I got to the end! I wrote, edited, polished, edited, and got all the way to “The End.”

Now… on to the query trenches.

rejection resized

May 04

When Reality Interferes With Your Goals

At the beginning of this year, I set for myself what I considered to be ambitious but achievable goals: accumulate 75 rejections and edit my second book. Of course, I wasn’t really after 75 rejections; I was hoping that I could find an agent who wanted my book before I hit that number. But querying 75 times was something I could control, so that was the official goal.

I didn’t exactly hit the ground running—I spent the first week of January laid up with the stomach flu. Ugh. Then, I wanted to wait for a response from the two agents from whom I’d won feedback during my Nanowrimo contest participation. If I’m really honest with myself, I wasn’t hoping for feedback. I was hoping for a stamp of approval, something along the lines of, “Yes, this book is ready. Go forth and query! In fact, query me!”

sad Winona Ryder from What I got was a lot of confusion and a very gentle, “You’re not quite there yet.” Oooof. Reality bites.

And yet, better to find out that way than by getting 75 rejections, right? Since an author can usually query an agent only once per story, I didn’t want to waste opportunities if the story wasn’t ready.

Fortunately, I also got some really good suggestions from a knowledgeable friend, who read my story not once but twice! With a little reluctance (how much longer is this process going to take??), but also a lot of motivation (I will work until I succeed!) and some direction, I embarked on yet another edit. I followed Susan Dennard’s amazing revision process, and spent way more time brainstorming than I had hoped to. I reconsidered nearly every aspect of the story, all the way from scratch, and landed not too far away from where I started.

Finishing the edits again took way longer than I wanted—I had hoped to be done by the end of March, and it was almost the end of April—but I was still able to submit to RevPit, an online mentorship contest run by a group of freelance editors. Though I wasn’t selected as a winner, I got unbelievably encouraging feedback from one of the editors. It was so incredibly validating (yes, I’m using all the adverbs today) to see that my deep, deep edits had indeed made the book better—even good enough that someone could be excited about it!

Of course, the feedback, while good, still means that I have another round of editing to do before I will really want to query this story. But I’m almost as happy as if I’d won the contest. When I’m editing by yourself day after day, I get to the point where I can’t tell anymore if I’m actually improving the story. Now I know that my efforts were indeed helping, and I’ll have a clear direction for where to go from here. Hopefully, making the story even better will mean I won’t have to go through 75 agents before I sign one.

But if I do, at least I still have the second book that I’m anxious to get back to!

Apr 20

Getting to know me

Facts about me

  • I can’t remember when I didn’t want to be an author. I wrote my first story in Kindergarten, and I still have it (thanks, Mom!). It was about a princess, a dragon, and a knight, so… not much has changed.
  • pimpmybioI graduated from the University of Michigan. (Go Blue!)
  • My favorite Doctor is Ten (with Rose Tyler, as it should be—FIGHT ME), but Nine was my first, and you never forget your first Doctor.
  • I love ballroom dancing (that’s how I met my husband! See pic at right).
  • I have two boys. The oldest just started Kindergarten and the youngest just finished potty training (cue the choir of angels!).
  • Costumes I’ve worn in public: Jem, She-Ra, Wonder Woman (before everyone knew how cool she was), Princess Peach, Princess Buttercup, Agent Lucy Wilde (my son really wanted to be a Minion), Galadriel
  • I carry teabags in my purse because you never know when you might want good tea, like airplanes that carry only Lipton, fancy dinners that don’t have decaffeinated black tea for drinking with dessert—you know, the usual. My writing ritual requires tea and I drink unhealthy quantities of it.
  • If I could be anywhere right now, it would be on a tropical beach with a drink that has a little umbrella in it.
  • Chocolate is life and you can’t persuade me otherwise. I’ve now trained myself to like dark chocolate, and the best chocolate bar I’ve ever tasted is Divine Chocolate Hazelnut Truffle. If you bribe me with that I will do almost anything for you.
  • I’m a Ravenpuff. When asked whether I’d rather be right or kind, the former wins but the latter is what I try to do.
  • When I have to choose a favorite book, it’s always The Blue Sword, by Robin McKinley. (Corlath! *swoon*)

About My WIP

An ugly alchemist makes a magic mirror, only to discover that beauty doesn’t fix her problems and magic always has a price. In the tradition of Wicked and The Forbidden Wish, my YA fantasy novel The Alchemist’s Mirror brings to life the backstory of Snow White’s stepmother in a 14th century that never was.

Jan 01

New Year’s Goals

I ended 2017 by getting the stomach flu and eating nothing but 7-Up and white bread for three days, so we have nowhere to go from here but up!

See the source image

My 2018 writing goals are pretty simple:

  • Accrue 75 rejections for Alchemist’s Mirror
  • Finish two revision passes on my 2017 NaNoWriMo novel

Of course, if I find an agent before I get to 75 rejections, so much the better! But general wisdom says you haven’t given your novel a real effort until you’ve queries at least 75 agents. General wisdom also says that the best thing to do while you’re in the “query trenches” is write the next book! (And, of course, keep improving the work you’re querying if you get actionable feedback.)

In fact, I’ve already secured my first rejection! Technically, it arrived Dec. 29, 2017, but it arrived after I made the goal, so I say it counts. It was a very nice, personalized rejection that complimented my talent—so while it didn’t have actionable feedback, that might just mean I’m on the right track. Here’s to your success in 2018, however you define it!

Nov 01

Words for a Cause

candy hangoverHappy November, everyone! For writers, the day after Halloween brings not just a candy hangover but the beginning of National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo for short. Those who sign up attempt to write a whole novel during the month of November. (The target of 50,000 words is technically a little shorter than most novels, but still a lofty goal for 30 days.) “Wrimos” who participate in “Nano” get pep talks from published authors, organize community “write-ins” where authors gather to motivate (and sometimes distract) one another, and provide plenty of accountability and camaraderie to keep going to the finish line.

I wasn’t planning to join this year, but then author Susan Dennard announced The Mighty Pens, a team of writers who want to use their words for good. That got me thinking. My book is in a slower editing/querying phase, plus I’ve never tried working on multiple projects at once, a skill that I’ll need if I make a career out of this writing thing. “Just to see,” I started to brainstorm an idea that’s been percolating in my head since May, and that multiplied into many ideas that seem almost novel-shaped.

So I decided to throw my hat into the ring! (more like the three-ring circus…) We’re raising money for the Malala Fund to support girls’ education. You sponsor me, I get motivated to keep going, the Mighty Pens authors (including me) qualify to to win prizes, the and the Malala Fund helps girls all over the world get the education they need to secure a better future. It’s win-win-win-win! Winning all around!

You can make a one-time donation now or follow my progress (I’ll be posting it on Twitter, my Wrimo page, and Facebook, in descending order of likely frequency) and donate anytime in November, such as when I reach word-count milestones. A pledge of 0.1¢/word would be just $50 if I reach my Nano goal. My fundraising goal is $500, or 10 people pledging less than a penny a word! (To be fair, these are cheap first-draft words, but it’s a “real” story with structure and everything.)

I’ll also share story-related bonuses with you as I reach fundraising milestones, like a novel aesthetic or snippets of prose. Stay tuned for surveys on what people want. For now, here’s my inspirational book “cover.”

The Magic of Movement and Light

This is what happens when someone with no design skills uses Photoshop. (Photo credit.)

Sep 22

A Year of Writing Dangerously

Cup-of-teaOK, I don’t know that my writing qualifies as dangerous, but it has been a year since I started this crazy experiment of being a full-time author. It’s been a while since I did a retrospective, so now seems like a good time!

When I quit my day job, my counselor warned me that for every year that I was in the old job, it could take a month to adjust to a new routine. Since I was in my old job for twelve years, that means I needed to give myself permission to take up to a year to get into a new groove. I’m happy to report that I have a pretty good groove going now, a year later. Of course, my routine has to be flexible because what I’m writing and the life around my writing is always changing (first kid started elementary school!), but overall I’m more confident now that I’ll get everything done if I stick to my plan.

Things I’ve learned in the past year:

  1. My addiction to tea has not diminished. The opposite, actually.
  2. Ergonomics are really important. Ignore at your peril. Back spasms and stiff necks will hamper my productivity.
  3. Rituals and routines are more important than I realized. As it turns out, it’s well-documented that creative people benefit greatly from habitual triggers that put them into the creative mood (e.g., a specific kind of pen or notebook; a specific playlist; a specific place to sit; or a ritual like starting with a hot cup of tea). At first, I did it subconsciously, but now I try to do it intentionally.
  4. I can’t actually write for eight hours a day. Besides the obvious necessary breaks, the concentration required to focus on my own writing is too intense to sustain all day; generally, I get only about four hours of really productive writing time. The good news is that knowing that helps me stress out less, because I can remind myself that if I don’t write a lot in the morning, I can still have a good afternoon, and conversely, if I do have a good morning, I shouldn’t feel bad when I run out of steam mid-afternoon.
  5. There’s still plenty I can do in my writing time besides writing: read work from critique partners; read published books; cultivate my social media presence (got to be careful not to let that become a black hole, though…); and take care of my physical and mental health (yoga, counseling, etc.). It’s surprising how hard it is to remember that those are furthering my career.
  6. That said, I am very deadline-motivated if it’s a real deadline. I can and will make a heroic effort to meet a deadline, including working way more than 8 hours a day, though I’ll need some recovery afterward to catch up with everything else. Fortunately, publishing has a lot of “hurry up and wait.” But it’s useful to know that about myself for the future!
  7. Seriously, all the tea.

tea2